I called him last night. We talked for awhile, although 2/3 of the conversation was silence. I pretty much spilled my guts. He told me that he didn't have enough time to give me the attention that I deserved and that, because of two recent events that have happened to him in the past week, it probably wouldn't be the best idea for us to get back together right now. He can't do anything with anyone for good long while. He has more important things to worry about than how the other person is feeling.

I cried for an hour. I fell asleep in my clothes, without brushing my teeth, listening to The Magnetic Fields "Nothing Matters When We're Dancing" on repeat. I dreamt that small children were singing me songs and giving me hugs and laid me down to rest in a bed of flowers.

I'll be okay. Someday.